We live in a systemic world where rules and regulations govern reality. Take the laws of the road, where you must stop at red and drive on green; the civil, criminal, and constitutional laws dictated by the government; scientific laws that explain the motions of energy and matter; and those unwritten social rules that are so blatantly obvious you cannot believe you have to explain them.
Enter: The Law of Attraction
The Theory
Here’s the theory: the thoughts you think create the reality you live. Focus on self-doubt, and you will attract other energies of self-doubt. Focus on prosperity, and voila – you just bought yourself a new Bentley. We are all magnetic beings vibrating through the universe, attracting the same energy we emit.
The roots to this audacious law can be traced back to Buddhist philosophy 2600 years ago. Buddha was the first, allegedly, to proclaim,
“What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you create” – Buddha
In theory, all you must do is focus on what you desire, and if you spend enough time focusing on it, it will magically manifest itself into existence. And if Buddha said it, it must be true… Right?
Whether it is the angels of the universe controlling your fate, or simply a psychological confirmation bias, there is good reason to give credit to the law of attraction.
Let’s take the famous Jim Carrey story, where he wrote a $10 Million check for “acting services rendered” and gave himself three years to cash it out. Wouldn’t you know – three years later, he signed the deal to do Dumb & Dumber for exactly $10 Million.
He’s not the only preacher of this law, either. Arnold Schwarzenegger visualized himself winning the Mr. Universe title years before he made it to America, and Connor McGregor has spoken several of his UFC victories into reality. Even Lady Gaga confessed that she repeated a mantra to herself for five years before she made it famous. Other famous practitioners include Will Smith, Oprah, Russell Brand and Jay Z.
But despite the success built from this pseudoscience framework, there is still a lot of interpretation behind it. The question does not concern whether or not it works – if you plan and visualize your future correctly, you can absolutely manifest your goals. But sometimes, the things we think we want do not actually make us happier. We have to know what to attract first.
As liberating as it may sound, the law of attraction is still a law, and there are still rules to respect in order to maximize your success. I want to clear up a few misconceptions and how to actually use this mystical phenomenon for the greater good.
1) Not Everything You Want Is Good For You
There is a widely held belief that all you must do to activate this magnetic lure of love and abundance is to focus on what benefits your immediate gratification. That’s a recipe for calamity. Think about your childhood restrictions – why did you have to eat your broccoli before dessert? Why couldn’t you play with legos in the fireplace?
As children, we did not have the wisdom to understand the meaning behind rules, and this was very frustrating. So frustrating that you had to devise a plan to slip past mom when she is in the bathroom. You grabbed a chair to climb up to the top shelf, snatched the box of Decadent’s, and ran to your room with a handful of four shoved in your mouth. It’s exhilarating, for a moment, until your belly hurts and your innocence is ridden with guilt.
Funny enough, not much has changed since then. As humans, we are programmed to think we know exactly what’s best for us, and this only solidifies with age. But every now and then, we are hit with the sledgehammer of reality.
“I only know one thing, and that is I know nothing” – Socrates
The misconception behind the law of attraction is based on self-absorption. The thing you want might not be what you need right now. If you always got what you wanted, would you really be happier? Don’t let the law of attraction turn into the law of grandiose narcissism – you may not know what’s best for you.
Instead → listen and acknowledge the advice of others; they may have more experience than you that can help in the long-term. Be open to new perspectives and do not close yourself off from valuable resources.
2) Do Not Tie Your Goal To Your Ego
We are all noble employers of ego gratification. It’s ingrained in our DNA – humans have a need for power and status. So to go against the grain of this natural instinct is nothing short of demoralizing.
Contrarily, a life based on power and status reinforces the notion that you need external validation to be happy. The inconvenient truth about the ego is its insatiable thirst for more.
Let’s go back to the Jim Carrey example; despite raking in millions from Hollywood and becoming one of the most celebrated actors of his generation – his lifelong dream – he was exceptionally depressed and lonely. The same can be said of Robin Williams.
“I wish everyone could get rich and famous and everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that’s not the answer” – Jim Carrey
I must also admit, Buddha’s quote on attraction was taken out of context. Buddhist philosophy is grounded in the idea that all desire and attachment inevitably lead to suffering. Isn’t that ironic? You can create your reality by imagining anything you want, but if it stems from desire, you will not be happy. How does one attract something without desiring it?
Instead → tie your objective to an internally validating goal; something that is altruistically or mutually beneficial. If your goal is to attract wealth, focus on what that wealth can do for others. If it’s to attract a significant other, focus on their internal grace rather than physical beauty. This will improve your odds of attracting what is right for you in the long-term.
3) You Have To Actually Work
You can visualize your goals and aspirations all you want. You can paint a mental portrait of them and hold it in your mind’s eye for years to come. You can tell others about them, write them down in your journal, and pay a hypnotist to align your frequency with their vibration. But eventually, there will come a day when you will need to execute.
One of the biggest misconceptions about the law of attraction is the idea that visualization is more important than execution. Bullshit. While strategic planning is certainly important, you may not know what to plan for if you have never practiced it.
“Having a vision for what you want is not enough. Vision without execution is hallucination” – Thomas A. Edison
Instead → learn and plan as you go. Visualize and plan out your goal, then proceed to act it out immediately. Once you fail, revamp your strategy with what you have learned from the field. Not only does this build momentum, but it also builds confidence and further harnesses your creative energy.